Cheap Gothic Soap Opera, Part 79

Sturgy stood on the train tracks. Suddenly, she realized that she had no way of getting to the Woodson estate! The family was against riding cars to train stations, because it is a preposterous notion. Then a man in a long trench coat came up to her.

"Hey, you. You need a...uh...riiiide to uh....towwwn?" he asked menacingly and gothically.
Sturgy couldn't remember the rule... "you are supposed to get into cozy cars with kindly friends" or "you are supposed to get into unmarked vans with unfriendly strangers." She knew it was one or the other, but she couldn't remember if candy and lies factored in somehow. Then she remembered the rhyme the teachers told her from the old founding home days..."if you are living in a founding home, your parents don't love you--ome."

The stranger spoke again during the awkward thinking silence.
"Uh...Sturgy...it's me...Burk"
"Oh...have we met?"
"Oh...I meant Buck. My name is Buck, not Burk."
"Well, in that case, I trust you."

"So why are you all bundled up like that? Anyway?" asked Sturgy
"Why do you ask? I'm cold and I'm sight seeing, Sturgy, just sight-seeing. Nothing more than that. Not a dime."

They got to the Port Townport Hotel, and the clerk, too lazy to get up, said, hi. Please sign here sir--
"How do you know my name!?" cried Buck, "but you
*Ooooh oooh OOOOH, ooh ohh oh OOOH oh ohhhhhh, ohhh*
think you're so clever, I'm no sir, I was only in England for two months! Nothing more! When I get my revenge, I will...I ...eeat...yu!"

The clerk was a little frightened, so he got up, none of them saying a word, and went into the telephone booth that, as a matter of custom, had no walls, roof, or booth.

Buck and Sturgy listened to the conversation,
"Hello. Is Mr. Richard Woodenson there. Oh...are you his wife? Oh...oh...my apologies Elizabeth...well yes...I ... I know that you're his sister...well, that... that's not fair....ok...ok...I'm sorry...yes I know the rumors...no, no...no...of course not!...Davidson...no...he's perfectly normal...rumors of incest!...why no...I've never *chuckle* heard those...of course not....inbreeding never creates mental deformities...but...yes...I know that your question was just hypothetical and that rumors are never true......no...ok...well, tell him that I must speak with him immediately...yes...it's about...Buck...yeah, stupid old "Br(u/i)ck-head"...Buck is so stupid...I hate him. You do too? Well good...at least he'll never ever ever return and I never ever have to worry about him hearing this conversati--"

Buck dashed the phone from the clerk's hands.
"You fool!," he shouted, "I am Buck! Here for revenge! Now!"
*Ooooh oooh OOOOH, ooh ohh oh OOOH oh ohhhhhh, ohhh*

(OP: Ben, February 8 2008)