But the Shrimp people were not so foamy. Nor were they, unlike the boxes that hold UPS parcels, made of Styrofoam. Nor were they so willing to watch the slow cannibalization of the entire shrimp race by the customers at the various taverns along the New England coast.
Though it had only been 200 years since America was born, the Shrimp populations in the Delaware coast had plummeted by 200%, the impossibly high percentage is given because the Shrimp fishermen actually determined to bring shrimp to the Delaware coast, release them, catch them again, kill them, and then dump them back into the water with their poop veins removed.
A modern Shrimp person caught in the act of trying to clean and polish an SUV
But the Shrimp people were a proud and ancient race, descending from the passionate union between an octopus and a jelly toad.
In any case, the Shrimp people were keenly aware that the United States was to be a problem, and they endeavored to prevent the growth of this malicious, if not silly cancer. And so on one steamy July morning, when the cherry blossoms bloomed and the boxes of unopened Christmas presents were hungrily devoured by the Tomahawk Indians in exchange for their land and liberty, the Shrimp people came to the British aide.
(OP: Ben, February 3 2007)
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