Then, on the day of the election, the Crypto-Feminists marched on Salt Lake City with their army of politicians-who-were-killed-by-Twitters-McTwitters-but-were-now-reanimated-as women. You know what they say about women-zombie-politicians in the army - no, you don't? - well neither do I, although I assume the answer is more than slightly sexist and/or deadist. The Crypto-Feminist General Staff assumed the same when asked the question by MORGONATH in front of his headquarters at the newly built Palace of Heaven, Happiness, and Cinnabons (no, Cinnabon is not run by Mormons; they just know a good investment when they see it), constructed after MORGONATH ate the White House, and thus, they disbanded their army.
But this seemingly utter defeat was not a defeat at all. Nor was it utter, or even seemingly, despite what you might think. In fact, with the help of the Sitcom and Contrived Movie Plot Lobby, the Crypto-Feminists were able to put a one Trixie Johnson in the Palace of Heaven, Happiness, and Cinnabons. Trixie was a sorority girl at a particularly party-hardy school located either in Southern California or Miami (doesn't really make a difference) when, in a series of HILARIOUS circumstances, she becomes President of the US of A. "From toga parties to dinner parties, manicures to AIDS cures, and fashion to fascism, look out world! This White House is gonna partay!" [the plot of the coup wasn't changed after the recent disturbances in the government]. It should be noted, though, that the most prescient part of Trixie's slogan was that pertaining to fascism, for soon after ascending to her position of power, the people's laughter at the premise of such a comical presidency soon turned into fear. The quick and brutal execution of MORGONATH was but the first crushing down of her iron fist, and there were many similar acts in the short but terrible reign of Trixie Johnson.
Edit: If you were wondering about the bureaucrats, Glorious Leader Johnson had all the ones west of the Mississippi river fed to her highly-trained and deadly poodles as a message to the other bureaucrats not to dispute the "election."
"It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both." - Niccolo Machiavelli
(OP: Nate, August 26 2008)
But this seemingly utter defeat was not a defeat at all. Nor was it utter, or even seemingly, despite what you might think. In fact, with the help of the Sitcom and Contrived Movie Plot Lobby, the Crypto-Feminists were able to put a one Trixie Johnson in the Palace of Heaven, Happiness, and Cinnabons. Trixie was a sorority girl at a particularly party-hardy school located either in Southern California or Miami (doesn't really make a difference) when, in a series of HILARIOUS circumstances, she becomes President of the US of A. "From toga parties to dinner parties, manicures to AIDS cures, and fashion to fascism, look out world! This White House is gonna partay!" [the plot of the coup wasn't changed after the recent disturbances in the government]. It should be noted, though, that the most prescient part of Trixie's slogan was that pertaining to fascism, for soon after ascending to her position of power, the people's laughter at the premise of such a comical presidency soon turned into fear. The quick and brutal execution of MORGONATH was but the first crushing down of her iron fist, and there were many similar acts in the short but terrible reign of Trixie Johnson.
Edit: If you were wondering about the bureaucrats, Glorious Leader Johnson had all the ones west of the Mississippi river fed to her highly-trained and deadly poodles as a message to the other bureaucrats not to dispute the "election."
"It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both." - Niccolo Machiavelli
(OP: Nate, August 26 2008)
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